


Avengers Night at the Ark

by dragonofdispair



Series: Unrelated Prompt Responses [15]
Category: Transformers - All Media Types, Transformers Generation One
Genre: Avengers Movie Night, Fan Comics, Fanart, International Fanworks Day 2016, M/M, Photography, Shipping, Slash, Sneaking Around, Virtual Reality
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-02
Updated: 2016-01-14
Packaged: 2018-04-18 17:04:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 945
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4713710
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dragonofdispair/pseuds/dragonofdispair
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Fandom is Serious Business among Autobots.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. (...The Morning After)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I battled uncooperative toys, a camera that’s over twenty years old and won’t focus correctly (but which does have really great resolution when it works right), really uncooperative lighting and backgrounds, improvised set pieces, and unfamiliar photo editing software to bring you “Avengers Night at the Ark”. Supposedly Jazz and Prowl battled Loki, Hydra, Ultron and other Marvel villains, but in reality they fought alternate identities, jealousy, conflicting OTPs and Teletraan’s awful sense of humor.
> 
> Prowl’s pretty sure he’s not being paid enough to play peacemaker, but Primus-damnit they need all the Avengers to take on Galactus.
> 
> So … presenting a (really) short photo comic starring RID’15 Jazz and Combiner Wars Prowl as G1 Jazz and Prowl and the Mini!Avengers as Jazz, Prowl and Wheeljack

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For the prowlxjazz livejournal community anniversary challenge:
> 
> Our oreos need to recharge like all other Cybertronians. Now in this world, recharging involves plugging yourself into the main computer system for proper defragmentation. While your processor gets recharged, your consciousness is put into a virtual reality world created by the main computer system. (Think holodeck on Startrek, except instead of walking into a room they’re plugging themselves in directly). Cybertronians can interact with others plugged into the system or choose not to interact with any other recharging mech/femme by changing the settings prior to entering recharge (important if a mech/mechs want privacy). This system is controlled by artificial intelligence and reacts according to each mech’s needs/wishes/desires. 
> 
> In this VR world, Cybertronians can use their holo avatars to become anything/anyone they want. Animal, human, organic, go wild, be creative!


	2. Coda

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jazz resorts to sneaking around to get his fanfiction fix... much to Teletraan's annoyance.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Written for the writing group's Novelty Challenge: Pick something that you'll never write (whatever your reason for not doing so) and write about a character that likes reading it.

Jazz was an _excellent_ sneak. There was no one better, not even Mirage even though Mirage cheated like a cheating cheater in the sneaky-bot contest. The sneaky-bot contest that Jazz won first, second and third place in every time it was held. Superb, outstanding, magnificent, preeminent, matchless, peerless… whichever adjective you chose to use, the fact of the matter was Jazz was the best sneak in Sneaky Town. He was the _mayor_ of Sneaky Town.

And right now… Jazz was sneaking. 

_Not_ through the crashed Decepticon ship, or even through the humans’ data networks. Jazz was sneaking through the _Ark_. Past Autobots on night watch, around Red Alert’s (frankly) excessive surveillance network. And up into the _Ark_ ’s control room, where he gently shook hands with the one person he couldn’t sneak around.

“Hey Teletraan,” he whispered, just loud enough for the system to pick up the audio input.

**_No_**. Appeared on Teletraan’s screen and Jazz _didn’t_ make a frustrated engine-noise because if he made a frustrated engine-noise then he’d no longer be _sneaking_ and this was a mission that _absolutely required_ sneaking.

“Please Teletraan. I just need to check. I won’t post anything new tonight.” Wheedling, on the other hand, _was_ allowed… especially since Teletraan needed to be wheedled. Rebellious AIs would still keep his secrets — thus talking to him wasn’t violating the Rules of Sneaking, but wheedling didn’t, as long as no one else heard him wheedling — but didn’t always do what he wanted.

**_I currently do not have the extra bandwidth required to support your habit tonight_ ,** Teletraan responded. **_My current tasks have priority. Thus my answer is No_.**

Hard to argue with that. That didn’t mean Jazz wouldn’t try. “Just two minutes. Just to check. If there is something there I won’t even read it until you’re done… but I need to bookmark anything that’s there before it gets buried under a ton of anonymous comments. _Please_.”

**_No. Come back when I do not have so many priority tasks._ **

That was a blatant and unsubtle attempt to get rid of him. “Just one little fic? Please… You know I’ll stand here all night distracting you if you don’t…” Bargaining and blackmailing were _also_ allowed while sneaking.

Teletraan considered. **_I will give you exactly two minutes of access,_** finally appeared on the screen. **_After which you will leave me to my tasks or I will alert Prowl to your presence here._**

Shipping was Serious Business among the Autobots because of the weekly Avengers VR scenario. Shipping Wars could spill over into real life when someone shipped two characters whose players were dating — or _not_ dating.  And Prowl — Captain America — who had to herd them into some semblance of functionality to defeat the Villain of the Week, had to deal with it all. Needless to say Prowl would Not Approve of Jazz’s presence here. Prowl didn’t approve of kinky fan fiction and he _really_ didn’t approve of diverting Teletraan from important tasks to indulge in kinky fan fiction. Prowl was about ninety-five of the one-hundred and one reasons Jazz was sneaking into the control room of his — or, well, _the Autobots’_ but really it was the same thing — own ship. Bargaining and blackmailing were also things that could be used against him, but Jazz almost didn’t care because two minutes of access was two minutes more than he’d had two minutes ago. 

Silently he fist-pumped the air and slid into the chair in front of the terminal.

With all the skill and speed he used to counter-hack Soundwave, Jazz logged onto the email box he had set up just for using Livejournal, Dreamweave, FanFiction.net, Ao3 and — he shuddered theatrically — Tumblr. He followed lots of stuff, but with only two minutes he focused on _Avengerskink_ , clearing comments that said nothing and bookmarking the links to new fics and requests. As promised, he’d read them later. 

[FILL] Hulk / Steve. Mutual first times. Monster Sex — the heading on the email caught his attention. That had been his request. Jazz made lots of requests, but only some of them got picked up. He was well aware that amateur porn wasn’t necessarily true to human biology, but not being human or possessing the requisite parts in question he didn’t really feel qualified in writing everything he wanted to read. Lucky for him… humans had come up with a solution. Anonymous kink memes. Specifically _Avengerskink_ because he really didn’t know (or _want_ to know really) why but imagining Steve and Bruce getting it on made his circuits tingle. Giddily he clicked on the email. 

> [FILL] Hulk / Steve. Mutual first times. Monster Sex
> 
> Original Request: Both Steve Rodgers and the Hulk are virgins. That’s what I want. Just lots of kinky monster sex with mutual cherry popping. 
> 
> Partial fill on Ao3 Here _._

Jazz clicked on the link. Someone had finally picked up his req, and now he was going to read all about —

Teletraan shut down his connection. **_Your two minutes are up._**

“Why you gotta always ruin my fun, T?”

**_You were the one who originally suggested the time limit as a compromise. Now go, or I will alert Prowl._** Jazz muttered uncomplimentary things about being ganged up on and Teletraan made a frustrated _bleep!_ from one of his secondary speakers. **_I saved the link for you. You can read it later._**

Now there… there was a true friend. “Thanks T.”

Teletraan didn’t answer. He just went back to… whatever he’d been doing before Jazz had showed up. Jazz snuck away. Time to be a responsible commanding officer and recharge so he’d be awake tomorrow during shift… no matter how much he wanted to stay up reading.

.

.

.

end

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (Does not actually refer to any _Avengerskink_ request, past or future. Any resemblance to any such request is purely coincidental.)


End file.
